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I am curious... I would like to know.

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Peaches14 View Drop Down
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    Posted: 27 Nov 2012 at 10:14am
Hi Dani,

Wow, very interesting indeed.  I don't have anything quite that interesting about my family background.  My father's grandparents brought their family here from Sicily to Ontario although my grandfather never spoke Italian in the family home.  The descendants on my mother's side are English and I don't have any history about them except that they were from Burlington, Ontario and eventually moved to Hamilton.  I only speak and write English fluently although I enjoyed French class very much when I was in school.  I was 18 when I got married the first time and far too young I must say and it didn't last long.  I had one child from that union and he is the only one, now 30.  I married a second time in 1998 to a man that was 17 years younger than me and he was German.  He and his family were living in Hamilton when I met him.  I understand some of the language because the family spoke it all of the time as it was easier for them.  I was with this man for 9 years until his sudden death in 2006.  My heart literally broke into two pieces and I was lost for many years.  If it wasn't for the internet I would never have met and fell in love with my current husband who is Australian. I took his last name and didn't think twice about it. 

Since the shock of the death of my second husband I have never taken anything for granted.  I realize how important it is to be happy and to appreciate family and friends and to do the things in life I have always dreamed about.  I used to be a very serious person but all I want now is to be happy and live out my life with the man I believe is my soul mate.  I feel like the luckiest person alive to have what I have. 

I wouldn't say my life has been at all boring, as a matter of fact, it would be an interesting read but what I really want in this life is inner peace.  I don't want to harbour any bad feelings about this immigration process I just want to get moving in one direction or another and begin living.  I am not interested in any new challenges as I don't want to lose the goodness from my soul.  

I don't want you to be sad or scared.  Everything will work out in the end.  You just got off to the wrong start.  Tell me more about your second language.  I worked a second job years ago as a special needs worker with an adult child that had down syndrome.  He couldn't communicate verbally but did know sign language.  I considered learning it but was already working a full-time and part-time job and taking college courses at night, so didn't pursue it.


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~*Dani*~ View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ~*Dani*~ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 Nov 2012 at 12:19pm
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Edited by ~*Dani*~ - 27 Feb 2013 at 10:34am
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Peaches14 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Peaches14 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 26 Nov 2012 at 8:19am
Hi Dani,

I am not aware of the statistics regarding successful appeals but what I do know is that the more evidence of a solid relationship you have the better your chances are of winning the appeal.  I can tell that you love your husband but it may not be you they have the doubts about.  Definitely the short courtship was a trigger.  There are a number of things they are checking and I am guessing they have a checklist.  It is our responsibility to prove the genuineness of the relationship as well as our goals of residing in Canada with the inclusion of setting up with family and employment opportunities.  Do you mind me asking what your family background is.  I know you are Canadian but what is the second language you speak.    
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~*Dani*~ View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ~*Dani*~ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 24 Nov 2012 at 6:55am
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Edited by ~*Dani*~ - 27 Feb 2013 at 10:33am
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Peaches14 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Peaches14 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Nov 2012 at 1:49pm
You are definitely right, the waiting seems endless and additionally the immigration process in itself is demeaning and breaks a person down to the point that they have little to no self esteem.  After feeling so hopeless and helpless we all begin to second guess ourselves and are left wondering how falling in love and wanting to begin a life with our beloved partner could ever turn into something so sinister. 

I know you are hurting Dani and I am sorry.  I think you are probably more angry with your Country than anything.  If you are going to follow through on your appeal and you really love your husband then you need to initiate the process and move on with your daily life.  As you stated, life is short.

Take care.  I will be here now and again if you need to talk.
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~*Dani*~ View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ~*Dani*~ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Nov 2012 at 12:00pm
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Edited by ~*Dani*~ - 27 Feb 2013 at 10:33am
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Peaches14 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Peaches14 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Nov 2012 at 8:34am
Hi Dani,

We haven't heard anything since the file transfer but I believe it has probably been the best thing in this case as my husband and I had a very short courtship and got married within 4 months of meeting.  For us it really wasn't about what we built together as we are both 50 years of age, but more what we need from each other to enjoy the remainder of our lives and although our countries are at opposite ends of the world we are so similar in so many ways, it is incredible.  By the time we heard the file was transferred which was seven months from the time the application was submitted, we had accumulated a great deal of evidence which proves without a doubt the genuineness of this relationship, which I sent in to the local CIC in two packages about one month apart. 

Dani, the emails are the most important part of this package as they show timing, emotion, day-to-day life, and future plans. 

My husband and I likely have several more months of waiting which is horrible for him because he cannot work and he was a very social person in his home country and he doesn't have any close friends here but me and my family.  Furthermore he loves his country and would like me to be with him there but I have so much here and I am not quite ready to make that move unless I really have to.  We have alternative options such as pulling the application and starting one from the outside or he can go home and sponsor me from his country which by now shouldn't cause any dramas as we have lived together for almost a year.  However we don't have any financial issues regardless of him not working and we are together which is what we have always wanted and we have already waited out the inland process for 8 months.

In all honesty, after all the horror stories I have read off these sites I am feeling really good about our situation.  My husband's visitor permit is good until July of 2013.  Our local CIC has a waiting time of 4-6 months so we need to wait it out and regardless of what the decision is my husband and I will always be together, here or there it doesn't matter.  If it doesn't work out here I will definitely give up what I have here to be with him in his country.  I can't do what others are doing, living apart from their spouse.  My spouse is my best friend, my lover and the one willing to do and sacrifice anything for me.  I look so forward to going to sleep and waking up with him, seeing him when I get home from work and spending our evenings and weekends together.  There is no way I want to live apart from him and race home to see him on skype. 
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~*Dani*~ View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ~*Dani*~ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 22 Nov 2012 at 6:53am
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Edited by ~*Dani*~ - 27 Feb 2013 at 10:32am
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Peaches14 View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Peaches14 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 17 Nov 2012 at 8:26am
Hi Dani,

I was the same way about my husband and my emails to one another and didn't send them with my original application.  After the file transfer, once I stepped outside the box and took a look at everything I sent, I realized that it was the emails that displayed how and when our meeting took place, how the relationship developed and how strong our feelings for one another grew.  I ended up sending them in a further submission and was really glad I did.  Forget about personal and think convince. 
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~*Dani*~ View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote ~*Dani*~ Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 17 Nov 2012 at 6:50am
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Edited by ~*Dani*~ - 27 Feb 2013 at 10:32am
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